this is more of a reminder for myself than anything to share with people, but you all may resonate. It's from 5 Ideas for Stressful Living:
"Instead of merely trying to control the process of whatever it is
you’re doing, try gaining control over the results as well: instead of
focusing all your attention on what you are doing in the moment, divert
most of it towards trying to figure out how to ensure a particular
result. For this to be effective, it is helpful to imagine the less
desirable result as extremely negative and the desirable result as the
exact opposite, and believe that whatever the result, it will be
permanent. So, the less desirable result becomes something like permanent failure and misery, while the preferred result is seen as the ultimate answer to all my problems.
Imagining the future in terms of extreme polarities creates tension and
anxiety; the essential building blocks of stressful living."
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